Apparently blogging is not my "thing." Or, at the very least, not my "regular thing."
My life has been so busy, my head so full of lists of things to do, that I have had little to no time to write more than a sentence here and there, and certainly not full stories of what has been going on in my life.
Or, perhaps I have had the time without the proper motivation to do so.
I pick reason A.
Since I took the MCAT on September 8, my sister had her second boy, named Micah, and I've been spending loads of my free time with him. If I was not with my nephews, I spent much of my non-work time working on the AMCAS application (read: medical school app), reading my assigned books for CORE (discipleship training course through my church), and hanging out with friends. Of course, I was not done with my traveling for the year.. I went to both St Maarten and California; St Maarten for a week to visit the med students I had met on the mission trip to South Africa, and California for 5 days for my dear friend's wedding in San Jose and visits with other friends near LA. I would sincerely LOVE to write about all the glorious events of those two trips, but verbally telling the stories to my best friend took over 2 hours just for St Maarten, so I'm quite sure the type-written version would be a novel, and one that I am not, at present, equipped to write.
So.
Moving on.
Upon my return from California, I was inundated with secondary applications for all the schools to which I applied. Each one has slightly different questions and forms. All of them have essays. Mayo Medical School is my top choice. No offense to any of the other schools; it's just been a dream to be a student at Mayo, and honestly where I felt God is leading. The application is completed and submitted; they have it currently under review. "Prospective students selected for an interview will be contacted beginning late November." This means I could potentially hear something as early as next week. I could cry just at the thought of getting an interview. ^_^ Aside from Mayo, however, there are at least 15 other schools which require these secondary applications, with various due dates. Earlier this evening, I was feeling overwhelmed with the idea that I am applying to obtain a PhD! After all, I have only a small history of research, and certainly not of the magnitude I would like to accomplish with this degree! And while I was mostly able to silence the doubts arising with the truth that I believed God is leading me to this particular area, I was still unsettled by the amount of information being requested in each application, not to mention that 4 of the application deadlines are this coming Thursday. Add to this my poor sleep "schedule", the typical life relationship/friendship stresses, and all the lists of things I am involved with at church running through my head, and you'll begin to see how I felt that "overwhelmed" didn't quite seem to cut it. I remained unsettled as I drove back to my house from visiting my sister, brother-in-law and nephews tonight.. until I entered my guest bathroom, and there on the wall is a copy of an email I received as part of a devotional sent through PCHAS (a foster-orphan ministry program with which I volunteer) and the last line states: "Let go of your worry and fear. Trust in God."
And suddenly, and amazingly, I remembered where my hope is. My hope is not in my ability to answer these application questions well, nor is it in my ability to fix/perfect each relationship. My hope is in God. A God who very clearly states He has good things for me. And as a dear friend pointed out, I have to let Him define what those good things are.
As I read those lines on my wall: "Let go of your worry and fear. Trust in God," I recalled I have no reason to fear, no anxiety. I remembered the sermon I heard just this morning- That I should not be anxious for anything because for each and every aspect of life which might have caused me anxiety, I pray, with thanksgiving. And thanksgiving is the antidote for many of my maladies, sins which are mere manifestations of my focus being on something other than the Almighty God. Instead, I give thanks to God. And the peace of God guards my heart and my mind in Christ Jesus.
Ah, so there it is, in a nutshell. More like a coconut than a walnut.. but my trust is in God. My hope, in Jesus. And with that, I am kept in perfect peace. (Isaiah 26:3)
My life has been so busy, my head so full of lists of things to do, that I have had little to no time to write more than a sentence here and there, and certainly not full stories of what has been going on in my life.
Or, perhaps I have had the time without the proper motivation to do so.
I pick reason A.
Since I took the MCAT on September 8, my sister had her second boy, named Micah, and I've been spending loads of my free time with him. If I was not with my nephews, I spent much of my non-work time working on the AMCAS application (read: medical school app), reading my assigned books for CORE (discipleship training course through my church), and hanging out with friends. Of course, I was not done with my traveling for the year.. I went to both St Maarten and California; St Maarten for a week to visit the med students I had met on the mission trip to South Africa, and California for 5 days for my dear friend's wedding in San Jose and visits with other friends near LA. I would sincerely LOVE to write about all the glorious events of those two trips, but verbally telling the stories to my best friend took over 2 hours just for St Maarten, so I'm quite sure the type-written version would be a novel, and one that I am not, at present, equipped to write.
So.
Moving on.
Upon my return from California, I was inundated with secondary applications for all the schools to which I applied. Each one has slightly different questions and forms. All of them have essays. Mayo Medical School is my top choice. No offense to any of the other schools; it's just been a dream to be a student at Mayo, and honestly where I felt God is leading. The application is completed and submitted; they have it currently under review. "Prospective students selected for an interview will be contacted beginning late November." This means I could potentially hear something as early as next week. I could cry just at the thought of getting an interview. ^_^ Aside from Mayo, however, there are at least 15 other schools which require these secondary applications, with various due dates. Earlier this evening, I was feeling overwhelmed with the idea that I am applying to obtain a PhD! After all, I have only a small history of research, and certainly not of the magnitude I would like to accomplish with this degree! And while I was mostly able to silence the doubts arising with the truth that I believed God is leading me to this particular area, I was still unsettled by the amount of information being requested in each application, not to mention that 4 of the application deadlines are this coming Thursday. Add to this my poor sleep "schedule", the typical life relationship/friendship stresses, and all the lists of things I am involved with at church running through my head, and you'll begin to see how I felt that "overwhelmed" didn't quite seem to cut it. I remained unsettled as I drove back to my house from visiting my sister, brother-in-law and nephews tonight.. until I entered my guest bathroom, and there on the wall is a copy of an email I received as part of a devotional sent through PCHAS (a foster-orphan ministry program with which I volunteer) and the last line states: "Let go of your worry and fear. Trust in God."
And suddenly, and amazingly, I remembered where my hope is. My hope is not in my ability to answer these application questions well, nor is it in my ability to fix/perfect each relationship. My hope is in God. A God who very clearly states He has good things for me. And as a dear friend pointed out, I have to let Him define what those good things are.
As I read those lines on my wall: "Let go of your worry and fear. Trust in God," I recalled I have no reason to fear, no anxiety. I remembered the sermon I heard just this morning- That I should not be anxious for anything because for each and every aspect of life which might have caused me anxiety, I pray, with thanksgiving. And thanksgiving is the antidote for many of my maladies, sins which are mere manifestations of my focus being on something other than the Almighty God. Instead, I give thanks to God. And the peace of God guards my heart and my mind in Christ Jesus.
Ah, so there it is, in a nutshell. More like a coconut than a walnut.. but my trust is in God. My hope, in Jesus. And with that, I am kept in perfect peace. (Isaiah 26:3)
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